The cutie was a geeky. Admittedly, I don't know that for a fact, but I think it's a reasonable guess based on his reading materials, movie preferences, and musical tastes. The books were big, fat, serious ones — the kind that people don't read unless they're motivated. The movie preferences… well, he first took notice of me when I said something that indicated we might have overlapping inclination to particular movie kinds. Which I supposed we do. For music tastes, I'm assuming he is a flat-out classics and retro radical.
Don't get me wrong. Most of my crushes are in the same band of geekish/nerdish breed. What makes him a stand-out? He had this piercing yet seducing look. The cliché is to say that his mere presence made me “weak at the knees,” although the weakness was definitely at my stomach. Every time he looked at me, and I mean every time. Dammit! My rational, logical mind — which was busy trying to feed my mouth something half-way intelligent to say about anything and everything under the sun (art, or literature, or music) — will be interrupted and will be redirected to thoughts of "what ifs".
We are not just talking about any old cutie, but a cutie with very large books. And his smile? Every time he did it, a flock of butterflies flew up and down in my stomach. That would cause stammering and stumbling which I played off by asking him trivial and silly questions. Him being a snobbish person, would smile easily and would utter a few words and I must have seemed very interested to those few but meaningful opinions of him. After all, not only were the books large, but they looked rather hard. One would expect such a man to have opinions worth exploring. Hmmmm... Mr. Serious-but-smiles-easily!
So this was the first time in several years that I have really had an overwhelming primal reaction to a guy and actually felt good about it, and I'm really hoping my damn opinions don't get in the way.
A couple of days ago, I texted him, inquiring about something I'm planning to pursue. Actually, it was just an excuse so that I could give my phone number to him. Sadly. he hasn't texted again, so maybe all my wondering if I was too far to the center for him was all for naught.
In any case, the likelihood that he would actually read this is close to nil, so I feel like I can be more open about it here than I was in front of a crowd. So here I am, silently keeping my fingers crossed.
No comments:
Post a Comment